Thursday, November 8, 2012

#27: I Won't Give Up

A James Reid and Fretzie Bercede song-shot


~ ~ ~

It was a Saturday afternoon and James Reid and Fretzie Bercede were walking down by the park. It was already two months since James and Ivan, his best friend, asked Fretzie to be his girlfriend…at the same time. Fretzie admitted that she’s attracted to both of them and had to think about whom to choose, even though she’ll make one happy and leave the other brokenhearted.

“So, have you decided yet?” James asked to end the eerie silence between them.

Fretzie nervously glanced at him. “I…I haven’t…yet. I need more time. You know how hard it is to make such decision.”  She answered.

James just gave her a nod in response. He wasn’t sure if he should believe Fretzie. He was positive he could hear nervousness in her tone of voice and James knew that when she’s nervous, she’s telling a lie. But James let it pass for the moment as Fretzie bent down to pet a dog.

“Aw James, look at him. He’s so adorable!” Fretzie said as she glanced up at James.





James bent down to pet the dog as well. He couldn’t help but smile as the dog started licking his hand.

“He likes you.” Fretzie said.

“Oh my, gosh, you found my dog!” a lady’s voice said as Fretzie and James glanced up. James scooped the dog up and stood as he handed the dog to its rightful owner. “Thank you so much.”

“It’s okay.” Fretzie said. “He’s cute by the way.”

“Thanks.” The lady said with a grateful smile. “I gotta run. Thanks again.”

“No problem.” James replied.

They watched as the lady walked away and disappeared out of their sight.

“Let’s walk?” James asked.

Fretzie just gave him a nod. Both of them couldn’t think of something to talk about so silence once again fell over them. James glanced at the pretty girl walking beside him and saw how fidgety and nervous she was getting. He could tell something was bothering her, like she wanted to say something but is starting to hesitate as if a part of her brain started telling her not to.

Finally, she came to a decision.
“James.” Fretzie called.

“Fretzie.” James said at the same time Fretzie did.

“Okay. You go first.” James said, smiling at the girl in front of him.

“I…I gotta tell you something.” Fretzie announced with a shaky sigh as she fiddled with the hem of her red cardigan. “I just can’t hold it any longer so…”

“What is it?” he answered. James started to feel nervous. Is Fretzie finally saying that she chose him over Ivan? Or is it gonna be the other way around?

“I have decided.” Fretzie replied.

“And?” James asked.

“I’m so sorry but…Ivan and I are already a couple…for a week now. I’ve chosen him over you. I’m sorry if I wasn’t able to tell you sooner because—“

“Save it.” James interrupted.

“James…”

“Fretzie, please. Stop. Just…stop.”

With that, James took off. Fretzie watched as James walked away, punching a tree and kicking his car’s tire in the process. She felt tears pooling in her eyes as she caught sight of blood in James’s hand.

~ ~ ~

That night, James couldn’t stay in his room forever so he decided to drive away from his house and go to the nearest pub he could find.

Fortunately for him, there was one open just around the corner from his house. He wished he didn’t bring his car with him for he can just go for a walk. In that case, he would have more time to think about what happened in the park with Fretzie hours ago.

He pushed the door open and saw that maybe no more than fifteen were inside the pub. James headed straight to the counter and asked for a drink.

“What kind of drink, sir?” the bartender asked.

“I don’t care. As long as the drink is strong enough.” James replied.

The bartender just gave him a shrug and headed off to the shelves to grab whatever drink he was going to offer James. Soon enough, a drink was placed in front of James. He downed it quickly and as soon as the liquid coarse through his throat down to his stomach, he could easily feel the alcohol overcoming him.

James heard the doors of the pub opening and he glanced over his shoulder to see who it was. It was a girl. But the dizziness he was feeling at the moment fails him to recognize the girl.

He took another swig of the bottle and while he was drinking, James caught sight of the small stage by the far end of the pub, a neon sign hanging by the wall that read: Open-mic tonight. James carefully slammed the bottle on the table and signaled the bartender that he would like to sing a song.

“Are you sure?” the bartender asked. “I mean, you’re obviously drunk so…I don’t know what’s going to come out of your mouth. No offense, dude.”

“Just give me the damn microphone and let me sing.” James said.

“It’s right over there.” The bartender responded as he pointed at a certain direction.

“Thanks.” James mumbled before making his way towards the microphone. As soon as he got it in his hands, he marched towards the stage, grabbed the guitar from its stand and sat on the stool.

“Hi.” He said at the microphone, grabbing the attention of the fifteen people, now sixteen counting the girl that entered minutes ago that James still wasn’t able to recognize due to his on-going dizziness, inside the pub.

“I know I’m kind of drunk but…I would really like to sing a song for this girl who is my best friend alongside my other best friend. My best friend and I both developed feelings for her and we both asked her out at the same time. She was torn between us and asked for time to think about it. I waited for her decision for two months and just this afternoon, she finally told me that she already has decided. I found out that she already chose my best friend a week ago. Who would’ve known that they were already a couple behind my back?” James chuckled as he looked down at his feet and secretly wiped the incoming tears before they could even fall.

“I was so mad at her this morning,” James continued, “that I forgot to say something to her. I let my anger take over my body and mind that I forgot to tell her that even though she chose my best friend over me, I would like to let her know that I’m still and will always be her best friend even though I had to suffer everyday as I watch her and her boyfriend be all cuddly in front me.

“So Fretzie, I just wish that you will be able to hear me sing this song but I know you won’t because why will I expect you to be in a pub anyway? But still, I’m wishing…so here’s a song for you.”

When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
There's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find

'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got, yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up, still looking up.

I won't give up on us
God knows I'm tough enough
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

“Thank you.” James mumbled before standing up from the stool and placing the guitar back to its stand. He walked down the stage and as he walked passed by a certain table, a small, slender hand grabbed him by the arm. James stopped.

“James.”

James looked to his right and saw someone he never expected to be in there. “Fretzie? What are you doing here?” he asked.

Fretzie shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. Just don’t tell Ivan.”

“So, you heard the song?”

“And the words you said before it.” Fretzie said. “Yes, I’ve heard them all.”

“Fretzie, just so you know, I’m still your best friend even though it hurts.” James said.

The girl nodded. Her hand slid down his arm to hold his hand. “I saw what you did a while ago. You punched a tree. Now look at what it did to your hand.” Fretzie said as she gently caressed the bandage wrapped around James’s hand.

He let out a soft chuckle and continued to watch Fretzie’s hand moving around his large one. “I know I’m stupid. I shouldn’t have done that. It’s just that, I was so mad—“

“Shh,” Fretzie silenced him.

There was silence after that. The only sound they were able to hear was the faint sound of the music playing through the speakers, the clinking of the beer bottles and laughter.

Fretzie let go of James’s hand, much to his dismay. He wanted to feel her hand on his when he still has the chance to.
He heard her sigh. “I’m so sorry, James.”

“Stop apologizing.” James replied. “We all know it’s no one’s fault. It’s your heart that decided, Fretzie. It’s not like you can control it and dictate who you should choose and—“

The ringing coming from Fretzie’s jeans pocket interrupted James.

“I’m sorry.” Fretzie muttered as she reached into her pocket. “It’s I…van.” She whispered the last part.

James avoided her gaze. “Go. Answer it. It might be something important.” He said.

Fretzie slowly nodded. “I’m sorry again, James.” And then, Fretzie left.

James was left standing inside the pub. He took a seat at the nearest chair and buried his face in his hands. He couldn’t control it anymore. He felt his shoulders shake as he finally allowed his tears to flow down.

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